Repost: Bullying in Assumption San Lorenzo

Disclaimer: Noni Odulio, the author, happens to be a good friend. I am reposting his message to his fellow parents, originally published on his Facebook account, for 3 reasons. 1.) As a favor to him 2.) An urgent appeal to Assumption authorities to take immediate action and 3.) A message urging all schools to take action against all forms of bullying immediately and directly. As soon as a reply is published by Assumption San Lorenzo, Mom Exchange will immediately publish it as well. - Gary, Admin of Mom.Exchange.ph

Fellow parents,

On repeated incidents, most recently this morning, 28 February 2012, my daughter, Sophia Theodora R. Odulio (1-2), has been subjected to various modes and actions that are tantamount to physical and emotional abuse at the hands of her classmates.  These incidents started during the start of the current school year, when some of her classmates would deliberately put their feet in front of my daughter, in an effort to trip her while she is walking. On another instance, her textbook in Science was vandalized by her classmate with a derogatory word. After this incident, my wife and I requested for and had a meeting with Ms. Dela Cruz, Gr.1 class advisor, and Ms. Calderon, 1-2's Teacher-in-Charge to express our concerns about these incidents. We left that meeting with their assurance that they would handle the situation appropriately.

Unfortunately, the bullying incidents did not stop. Just last month, 24 January, my daughter was strongly poked in the back with a pencil by her classmate.  We wrote a formal letter to the TIC and Class Advisor asking them to look into this.  They replied that they would.

However, this morning, my wife calls me in tears.  She was distraught because Ms. Dela Cruz called her earlier and told her that at around recess time, my daughter found her lunch box in the garbage can. Upon investigation by their teachers, it was discovered that this incident was participated in, and instigated by, THE SAME classmate that poked her with a pencil last month.  

The only recourse my daughter has is to request her Teacher-in-Charge to move her seat further away from the offending student, so as not to attract any further negative action.  She said to us this afternoon, "You know, the good thing about today is I have new seat mates."

I, on the other hand, am not so constrained.

There is obviously a failure on the part of the Assumption College faculty and administration to protect and safeguard the body and possessions of their students.  This is simply unacceptable.

I demand accountability and responsibility. Schools are mandated to care for their students as secondary parents while the students are in their premises. The failure of the school to conclusively prevent these instances from happening after a warning had already been given about these instances prove negligence. My daughter has been subjected to repeated physical and emotional abuse, and this is equivalent to child abuse.

The school, however, is not the sole party liable for this. The task of educating the child falls on their parents first. I am also holding the parents of the girls who are bullying my daughter responsible for their child's actions. The Penal Code of our country does the same.

All of the other parents who seek to dismiss these instances as "growing pains" or "part of the culture" are either blind to the truth or party to the crime.  In no world is bullying and intimidation acceptable. Do we wait for our daughter to come home with physical scars? Do we allow her to endure this horrible situation because this will make her "grow up"?  Do we allow our daughter to be a perennial victim, a patsy, a pawn?

The school has to address this situation, quickly and decisively. I sent our daughter to Assumption primarily because her mother, and our other relatives and close friends, are alumna of this school. I hold all these women in high esteem, knowing that the values and character these women carry with them are greatly influenced by their alma mater. The failure of the school to address this situation has led my wife and I to question the relevance and effectivity of the education AC San Lo provides. 

Even if the school teaches the right things, do the classmates of my daughter get positive reinforcement at home? Are their parents supporting the values that their daughters are supposed to imbibe in school? If the parents of the students aren't good partners in education, will these girls be positive influences on our daughter? Being parents that want nothing but our child's success and happiness, these questions lay heavy on our minds.

I will be having a meeting with Ms Dela Cruz, the guidance councilor and the Student Affairs Director tomorrow morning. In that meeting, I will be also requesting to talk to the parents of my daughter's classmates. I believe that this is not something to be swept under the rug. This is an issue that has to be nipped in the bud before it escalates and becomes truly destructive. I want to be able to impress upon these parents that the task of education does not fall squarely upon the school's shoulders, and that we parents are responsible for our daughter's actions.

Bullying is an epidemic. It is a disease that has to be addressed properly, decisively, and with a concerted effort.  I just recently read an article about a father who committed suicide a year after his son committed suicide because of bullying.  Bullying affects everyone.  That is why there is no way that bullying should be allowed to propagate in our schools, and especially not in the first grade.  The school has to be more proactive with this matter.  The parents have to be aware of their daughter's actions and held responsible for this.

I will not allow my daughter to suffer.  I will not allow this instance to taint her precious and important childhood. I will fight, using my hands and fists if necessary, to protect her.  My wife and I stand together with our daughter.  We are strong and unafraid.  We will not cower to fear and intimidation.  We will not allow guilt or abuse to run rampant.   

Bullying has no place in this world.  It has to stop.